Sunday, March 28th, 2010

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Here is another segment of "Personal Relationship Therapy". A brief synopsis of the story of “Valentines Day Joe” who followed "The Mammalian Way", was able to read her behavior, temporarily shed his phobias, impress his love interest as only an independent man is able to do, in order to have his woman feel truly special,… and then be handsomely rewarded with the best sex of his life,….. and then receive a bonus to boot!

Listen to the 15 minute excerpt from the audio curriculum "The Mammalian Way"(TMW).


Men & Women learn that TMW can be seen as a "silent language for people who engage in relationships and the closest thing to communication via telepathy that humans possess in abundance"…..AND NOT ONLY FOR SEX, LOVE, AND ROMANCE…TMW can be applied to business or even a poker game….Tune in….listen & learn. The book can be acquired at The audios can be acquired by direct contact, "The Mammalian Way" will change your life for the better…More pleasure…Less Pain…I promise..


I do not encourage comments here. If you wish you can email me, I am the only one who reads mail sent there.

Copyright (C) Gary James 2010 all rights reserved



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Monday, January 11th, 2010

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Since I began to promote my book titled, “The mammalian Way” I have been asked for advice on just about every category of personal relationships, from dating to divorce as it were. Even though I can give a reasonable answer to most questions based on my experience as a social science researcher, the fact is, I have uncovered the bottom line reasons WHY humans behave the way they do in personal relationships, especially when sex* can become a factor. So I also typically take time to emphasize the importance of knowing WHY humans behave the way they do in personal relationships.

Knowing why is extremely important because it opens a psychological pathway for humans to routinely benefit by one of the most basic principles in all of mammalian society. Namely, the principle of acquiring less pain – more pleasure from virtually all personal relationships. And when you read my book you will find as human mammals go this includes the more cognitive influences on human behavior as well.

*(Sex, you see, is a most poignant common denominator between human social behavior and the social behavior of all the other mammals on the earth. I maintain that directly or even very IN directly it is sex, the potential for it (or lack of it) that plays a role in most issues that arise in human personal relationships.)   

Meanwhile, it is your own common sense, a reasonable level of reading comprehension, and at least some interaction with the opposite gender as well as follow the support venues I produce that will provide most of what you need in order to understand, apply, and otherwise benefit by the tenets (secrets) revealed in “The Mammalian Way” as to what you might do (and not do) to improve the overall quality of your life in personal relationships.


TO THAT END: Allow me to be your guide as you enjoy another segment of PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP THERAPY.

Keep in mind I am a Social Theorist not a therapist. Much of my research is centered on innate or instinctive human behavior and my theory was initially constructed to support those who administer therapy to others such as psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, and the likes.

Moreover, unless they have read my very simple work that contains a truly original theory of why we have much of the issues we do within “Love Interest” type relationships between the genders, the professors usually stop short of explaining the question, WHY.

Meanwhile, the material I share can be quite therapeutic because I have uncovered the bottom line root of WHY most of the issues between men & women exist.

From my research I eventually constructed a theory that was gleaned from direct interaction with thousands of people (in small groups as well as one on one encounters.) over a relatively long period of time (approx. 30 years).

In that time, I sometimes gave advice in the form of suggestions as to what might be done to improve a particular person’s situation(s) that they were in. I kept low key and only made suggestions where I knew I could follow up. I did this for two main reasons.

 One, most of the people I discussed my research with are/were licensed therapists who specialized in one area of psychology-sociology or another. Two, most of the people I researched data from HAD NO IDEA I WAS TAKING NOTES ON OUR ENCOUNTER.  

This methodology turned up some amazing things. For example, one thing I discovered was, most “people” ask questions, give opinions, and then display behavior that was most often in direct conflict** with what they told me. **(In other words, most people will lie to themselves, usually to satisfy the more cognitive or semantic influences of human behavior, including romance, then proceed to act out typical mammalian behavior often to the full as if drawn to it.)

The conflict occurred most often and regardless of their socio-economic-cultural or educational background and whether it was a part of one on one encounters or a mixed gender group. This is also how I knew I was on to something huge and something viable although early on I was not intent on an entire new theory that provides all professional therapists et. al. with a more complete paradigm of behavioral psychology.

I constructed a theory that is based upon one assumption and takes into account all or nearly all of the encounters that heterosexual human men & women can experience. Given the diversity of human encounters and their potential for peculiar behavior any theory that proposes a collective answer is at least an ambitious undertaking. This is why it took decades to complete.

The segment titled “Relationship Therapy” is an exercise area where personal relationship issues are shared and then we discuss the issue with respect to the many tenets of the theory I constructed that is part of what you will find when you read my book titled, “The Mammalian Way”. In order to receive the full value of the relationship therapy you need to use my book as a point of reference. You can buy the printed cover version for only $19.95 or the PDF file version of the book for as little as only $5.00 US Go to

I do not encourage comments on this blog. However, if you wish to contact me use or tweet me @garyjames

Copyright (C) Gary James 2010 all rights reserved 


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Thursday, May 14th, 2009

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…. Ladies please understand, The brick line is a universal line and will work on any guy, earth wide, between the ages of 12 to 92, whether he’s a buff jock or a pencil necked Geek. It does not matter!….

This repeating segment to my blog will give you the chance to ask me questions that I will provide answers for as well as useful information to help with everyday issues that can arise within most personal or professional relationships. This segment will also give you a chance to vent your emotions or confess your actions if you wish with complete anonymity. Feel free to use me as your sounding board. Especially if there is something stressful on your mind or if the information is juicy enough that you just need to get out.


I recently received a question. The asker, a woman who I will call “Julie”, wishes to remain anonymous. And so it will be. And the question is,

“Why would a guy that shows signs that he likes you suddenly start acting like a jerk”?


This was the entire question. It is a normal one that women often ask me.


Answer: Even though the question is a bit general, my first thought on this is to ask “Julie” if the guy who has shown interest in you has read any dating books? I ask this because one of the things that most dating books teach guys to do is, “Act like a jerk around a woman he’s interested in” because this is the way to win over a woman’s amorous charms.

The fact is every once in awhile, that blind advice by dating authors is correct. I say blind advice because most dating book authors admit they do not really know why in certain situations a guy acting like a jerk will increase a woman’s interest in the him.


I am also quite certain that this is because most personal relationship advisors that includes dating book authors, have never been introduced to the greater understanding of the instinctive behavior that is at the core of why such a ridiculous maneuver as acting like a jerk around a woman that a man is interested in even works once in awhile in the first place.


However, once you do understand the bigger picture (which you can learn from me of course) you will very quickly see that there are far better ways to reach for a woman’s attention.


In the situation with my anonymous reader Julie I do not know if she likes the guy who is acting like a jerk or if his jerkiness has actually raised her interest in him.

If Julie could have given me a few more details I might be able to provide you with even deeper insight. Meanwhile Julie, if you like the guy I have a generic suggestion that you might try.


Approach him with a compliment unrelated to the jerkiness such as, “Excuse me Guy, I’ve been meaning to ask you a question.” Then touch him gently on the arm where the Tri & Bicep connect to the shoulder then ask, “I was wondering, are you carrying bricks under that shirt”?


Now Julie,…. I know what you’re thinking…… “How am I going to ask a man I barely know such a question AND keep a straight face too”? Or something like that, right? …..Julie….please understand, The brick line is a universal line and will work on any guy, earth wide, between the ages of 12 to 92, whether he’s a buff jock or a pencil necked Geek. It does not matter! (LADIES: FYI, in my up coming book, “The Perfect Relationship” I explain why such a line works so well. Most people initially see it as, “feeding his ego”. NOPE! That’s not it. Ego is a mere surface issue with guys,…like a little dirt on your Jimmy Choos! The “brick” line plays into something much, much deeper in a man.)


Meanwhile, you can ignore my suggestion if you like,…. No problemo. However, if you can pull off that question with a straight face and a sincere voice intonation it can facilitate quite a number of things all at once. 1) Guy’s jerkiness will immediately be at least temporarily reduced to near zero. 2) That line will likely begin a conversation between the two of you. Whereby, he speaks directly with you as opposed to speaking with your breasts, for example. 3) It could very well seed the establishing of you as Queen Bee in his love life, so long as that is what you want.


If he turns out to be more of a keeper than a loser, then you can bother to address the jerkiness thing some time later. You can always write me and I will help you.


Also, please keep on the watch for the release of my book, “The Perfect Relationship, Secrets of How to Find, Build, and Keep it”!


Until then you can learn more about the bigger picture of instinctive human behavior in all personal or business relationships by reading this blog. It will give you a “Leg up on the Bunny” of everyday life.


Best to you,


Copyright Gary James ã 2009 all rights reserved.






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Wednesday, April 15th, 2009

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….Her whispers like, “Oh my dear, you’re really strong down there tonight”! and, “I’m lovin your lovin my lover” are just two of the casual comments my girlfriend made during sex….

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Men who use the brand I recommend report an over all improved sex life as well as improved confidence with women, and self confidence in general.

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Increase blood flow to the penis,

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Promote secretion of sexual hormones,

Elevate sexual desire and response,

Improve general vitality in a man.

The reports men give often spill over into all areas of men’s lives including: sex, relationships, work, and even sports. These are all important elements that can affect a man’s quality of life and the reason why I recommend the brand I do.

[Plus, my girl friend is the one who noticed the actual physiological changes in my sexuality. We were NOT having problems and she did not know I was experimenting with various natural penis enhancement brands because of blog posts I wanted to write. Her whispers like, “Oh my dear, you’re really strong down there tonight”! and, “I’m lovin your lovin my lover” are just two of the casual comments my girlfriend made to me during what started out as routine sex, but morphed into a sexathon where both of us ended up strewn out naked all over the living room sweaty and spent.]

Talk about improved personal relationships, visit for the complete story about the number one natural male enhancement experience. Meanwhile,

Confidence in those areas of a man’s life is also the main characteristic that 9 out of 10 women find sexiest in a man. Women are instinctively drawn to such a man. It’s what motivates a woman to come to you and to want to be with you. And that’s before she gets a load of your enhanced sexuality.

Do you want to experience an incredible sex life? Do you want your lover to honor you with her focused stare at you like you were the only man on earth? Then click here now to begin the system guaranteed to work! Improve your overall sexual stamina and Live Well!

Copyright © Gary James 2009 all rights reserved.

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Saturday, April 4th, 2009

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….there are a couple of very powerful instinctive forces at work as the root cause for the insecure behavior in women. 1) Men instinctively see women as sex objects first and foremost. 2) Women are instinctively grossly insecure. And when these two instincts collide,….

For decades, from a Social Theorist’s perspective I’ve listened to women lament about their supposed “Lot in Life”. A lot that set off the “Women’s Empowerment Movement” as it were. Meanwhile,

Most recently I saw a small group of women on a morning TV news show in discussion of the question, “why after years of struggle, are women (especially young women) as a group or individuals no closer to achieving the confidence and self esteem” that men seem to possess. Not that they compared their selves to men, but they were talking about how despite years of effort, according to a poll taken, their daughters have little or no self esteem once they get past puberty.

The results of the poll they mentioned did not surprise me at all. However, as the women’s discussion became stymied over the question “what can be done about it” I could not help but smile because I pretty much know why women face the issue of low self esteem.

The fact comes down to one thing: Women’s gross sense of insecurity (the actual root cause of the low self esteem) is an instinctive-physiological fact of being born a human female. Yes, women’s insecurity is as instinctive as knowing when they are hungry or thirsty. [This concept is a part of the theories I write about in my book titled, “In Search of the Perfect Relationship”].

This instinctive insecurity can manifest over a woman’s life time in various forms. The one form that came up in the TV discussion as an example is what I refer to as, “Women’s pecking order” that begins with, “The Alpha Female”.

Whereby, as though it were a fulfillment of their insecurity drive (or even a perverse way to satiate the need) women instinctively and continually compare themselves to Alpha Females a/k/a the 10.

And it’s easy to spot, just look at the front cover of women’s magazines. The Alpha female’s (10) look is conveyed to the readers as the standard. Even though women as a movement currently seem to have a push toward a “down play” of women comparing themselves to super models and others who’s physical look find their way to the cover of magazines, the fact is, all women have the propensity to compare them selves to the illusion of the Alpha Female, an illusion that men fall for nearly all the time. 

The thing I find interesting is, if women were to succeed in convincing magazine editors to dispense with the touched up photos of a beautiful women who does not seem to need touched up for the front cover, in order to induce a woman to purchase the magazine, what indeed would they replace it with?

I have no doubt women can find something other than an Alpha Female to put on a cover (Oprah Winfrey’s magazine “O” for example) but, if all magazine’s were to follow that lead it would leave a void as well as a wide open market for financial success to anyone who was willing to simply follow the bottom line of the way things are (and perhaps have always been). Namely, “Sex sells” and use it to sell magazines. The point I make here is actually mute because the magazines that use beautiful female models on the front cover to sell magazines to WOMEN is prolific to say the least.

For example, a touched up photo of an Alpha female on the cover of a magazine such as “Cosmopolitan” exudes sex appeal, and I doubt you will see Cosmo change that approach any time soon because the Cosmo editors know that selling the illusion in order to sell magazines works…..all the time! The fact that it’s motivated by a woman’s primal instinct of insecurity is of little relevance. 

Bear in mind, the readership of Cosmopolitan et al., is also far more women than men. In other words women’s instinctive insecurity runs deep enough that women literally dress up for other women! The attraction in doing so is a very subtle intimidation of the “other than Alpha Women” to comply with the dress code and over all Look of the Alpha female (the cover girl)

Meanwhile, there are a couple of very powerful instinctive forces at work as the root cause for the insecure behavior in women. 1) Men instinctively see women as sex objects first and foremost. 2) Women are instinctively grossly insecure. And when these two instincts collide, women for example intuitively know these 2 facts all too well and so in order to achieve esteem (by virtue of men looking at them) they “sexify” their Look to not only attract men’s eyes but they also attract women’s eyes in the form of envy & vanity….and it all emanates from instincts.

Also, in addition to the instinctive issue for women to always try to match the physical beauty of a cover girl Look there is a powerful emotional force that reinforces the insecurity drive and that is the fact that physical beauty in and of itself is fleeting which adds to the over all insecurity that women feel about their looks and this also translates into a woman’s innate feeling of low self esteem.

I realize that my perspectives and theories do not always sit well with women’s empowerment as a movement, at least initially. Women often deny the fact that their insecure behavior is instinctive as opposed to learned. Most women I have spoken with who challenge my perspective often site the numbers of women involved as a movement, meant as though if all women fought against the instinctive behavior, that this alone would serve to institute real change. The issue is, when a force is instinctive you can’t fight it with learned behavior. Nature will win out every time. On the other hand when a woman reads my copy and reasons it out is when real change becomes possible. Or so I’ve been told, and it’s also what I’ve observed statistically in women’s behavior. 

Given what I know about human behavior and the theories I’ve written, I predict that so long as women work toward and try to change the behavior of women against their own instincts it will be as valuable to women as is spitting into the wind.

So, will women ever become truly empowered on a personal level? Not so long as they fight against their own instincts.

However, the question that does remain is, “what do women do to improve their sense of self esteem” knowing their behavior insecurity issue is instinctive? There is an answer to that question but that’s another blog.

Copyright © Gary James 2009 all rights reserved


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