Archive for May, 2012
Saturday, May 26th, 2012
… George told me he only paid attention to me because he “could see his second marriage going the same [bad] way as the first.”….
Most men have an aversion to talking about relationships.
However, since I also know that most men are hurting inside because they are in a constant state of “Double Dis” the fact I maintain that two people in a relationship can gain what they truly desire from the same relationship actually appeals to a man’s mind as well as his instincts but they also don’t believe that such a situation is possible.
As a result there are many men who tell me they have “given up trying” to figure her out or to be what she wants me to be. When they say such things to me I usually start to laugh and say “well then you might as well take a machete and just cut off your cock & balls…. Cuz you no longer need them.” That comment usually either ends the conversation abruptly or it opens a conversation between us about his relationship with his girlfriend or wife. Meanwhile,
I want to share with you about a guy who recently said to me that he had “given up trying.” I will call him George to protect his anonymity.
After George’s comment to me I gave him my usual remark and a conversation began. George eventually asked me, “Well what should I do then to get her to tell me what she wants?” My answer was, “George, it doesn’t work that way. Men are not supposed to figure out women. We are male mammals first and that fact can never escape you when you meet, date, mate with, marry, or otherwise interact with a woman.”
Since he had not yet read my book I knew he would not understand my answer so George said, “Well what the “F##K” does that mean?” I said, “Have you ever had a dog?” Then he laughed and said, “Yea, his name was JD.”
I asked, “Did you hug JD and love JD and open up to JD and were there times when you knew you could tell what he was probably thinking or feeling… and maybe times where you knew that he knew what you were thinking or feeling too”? George said, “Oh yea!” Then I asked, “Is JD still alive?” George said, “No.” I asked, “How did that make you feel?”
With a plain pale look on his face George quietly said, “I cried and I never cry.”
I said, “YEP!” “It’s because you had a cross species mammalian connection with JD and that connection caused the two of you to bond and that’s what made you & JD love each other unconditionally. And that’s why you cried when he died.”
George said, “so I should love my wife like my dog?” I said, “Not exactly. With a dog or other animal there is no Cognitive Capacity (CC) because unlike humans, animals have no power of reason to contend with. But with another human, especially a woman you are involved with there is your CC as well as her CC that figures into the mix.”
I went on to explain how easy it is for humans to use their CC to interfere with the intentions of the set of survival instincts I call The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) and how badly we can mess up a relationship with the opposite gender when we do.
I further explained that it was his inherent responsibility to use his CC in league with his mammal instincts in order to look after the well being of his wife, and then I added, “And that includes looking after her emotional well being by using your mammal instincts to open up to her mammal instincts just like you did with JD.”
At first I could tell that George did not like hearing the fact that he was responsible for his wife’s emotional well being so he started to ask me another question but then stopped in the middle of a sentence and asked, “How do I get a copy of your book?”
I told him and then I said, “George you are a rarity because most guys will not allow new information into their brain no matter how useful it might be!”
This prompted George to admit the real reason why he wanted the book and why he was willing to speak with me. It turns out he was married for 7 years and then his first wife divorced him. This was his second marriage of two years and his second wife was already on the brink of leaving. He only paid attention to me because he “could see his second marriage going the same [bad] way as the first.”
He bought the book and I also gave him a couple other suggestions. Then about two weeks later he called me and said, “Gary, you’re a genius.”
He went on, “What you shared with me not only makes sense, it worked!”
Sure it does and that’s because TMW is nature’s way to build and keep a relationship healthy, loving, and growing at the mammalian level of life. Moreover, George’s cognitive capacity (CC) is now in line with his mammal instincts as well as her mammal instincts. They were able to rejuvenate the mammalian connection that was formed at the beginning of their relationship, and when that happens, most relationship issues tend to fade away or dramatically diminish.
The discovery I made and the working model I constructed has never failed to produce positive results so long as you follow nature’s processes and you don’t allow your CC to interfere with following those processes.
It’s all about caring for each other’s needs at the most basic level and since the mammalian connection is the place where love grows, and bonding deepens, it’s also the reason why both people in a relationship can gain what they truly desire from the same relationship. And it gets easier & easier to do over time.
The book is an introduction and the audio series is a continuation of how to use TMW processes to benefit your life. Click here for products & services.
Sunday, May 13th, 2012
…long ago nature decided that NO human relationship can develop between a man and woman until SHE picks the male, and so it all begins with Y-O-U…
LADIES: Right up front allow me to explain I did not invent The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) . It is a gift from nature to all human beings, but many people do not know it exists… just yet. I discovered it, uncovered it, drafted a reasonable theory, and constructed a working model of how it operates on human social behavior. I did this in order to help you understand how to use it in your everyday life as the protection and the socialization tool it is meant to be.
But why even bother to care about making a mammalian connection with another human being? Actually you make mammalian connections all the time. Most of the ones your instincts initiate for you with other humans will disintegrate very quickly because we use our brain’s cognitive capacity to interfere with TMW’s processes. And that can be a good or bad thing…
On the other hand, most people have routinely formed a cross species mammalian connection with their pets (primarily dogs & cats). The mammalian connection is why pets respond to you and grow to love you. That’s because the mammalian connection between you and your dog or cat is the place where love grows. It’s a mammalian thing! And it works! It’s the lowest common denominator in building relationships with other mammals, and as your knowledge of TMW grows you are going to find that this mammal to mammal, mammal to animal relationship building tool includes human to human interaction.
As another example, there is a saying that goes, “when a stranger walks into your house watch the reaction that your kids and dogs have toward that stranger.” Whereby, if the dogs & kids don't like the stranger… then you should especially beware….
This “saying” comes from the fact that the dog establishes an accurate read on the stranger using their mammal instincts…. and so do the kids. Why the kids? Simple; kids do not develop a mature use of their cognitive capacity until they reach the age of 25. Kids rely much more on their mammal instincts. You just might not call it mammal instincts….
Meanwhile, mammalian connections are a normal occurrence for humans because we use them all the time. Part of what I uncovered in the process of discovering how TMW fully functions to help humans form relationship bonds with each other is how essential the mammalian connection is to building a solid relationship with the opposite gender. I discovered it’s the place where love & attraction attaches itself to in order to grow, and it’s also the place where monogamous bonding forms & grows. TMW over all is a very useful tool for quickly sifting through men without necessarily having to date them in order to find The One!
HOWEVER, as with most things in nature TMW follows very specific processes. And those processes need to be followed accordingly in order to achieve successful positive results. And that’s where we humans have managed to ““F” it up!”
We use (or rather we misuse) the cognitive capacity (CC) of our brain to interfere with TMW processes, especially in the area of Girl meets GUY; i.e., the act of meeting, dating, mating, and over all relationship building with the opposite gender.
And when we interfere with TMW process of Girl meets Guy the end result is usually a failed relationship because either her set of TMW instincts, his set of TMW instincts, or both sets of TMW instincts will reject either her, him, or both of you, as not being The One!
If & when YOUR instincts reject HIM, or HIS instincts reject YOU, then believe it or not, your CC or his CC becomes pretty much useless in turning the relationship back around. This one factor is the chief reason why there are so many relationships that start out as two people who are deeply in love only to end up as two people who cannot stand to look at each other. They interfered with or did not nurture the mammalian connection.
When the instincts reject you or him it damages or breaks the mammalian connection, because TMW connection needs to be nurtured, because the nurturing is what helps the love & attraction that attaches to the mammalian connection to take root and to grow.
It’s the damage to the mammalian connection that causes the love, attraction, commitment, monogamous bonding, etc. to fade which in turn causes the relationship to fail. FYI, this scenario is prevalent to relationships within human culture.
SO, why am I placing this blog in the messages to women category? BECAUSE, long ago nature decided that NO human relationship can develop between a man and a woman until SHE picks the male. And so it all begins with Y-O-U! And even though it is a social norm for men to do the asking the reality is, his process of asking no matter how flagrant is from the making of a mammalian connection perspective, essentially a showing off of his pretty feathers for the woman just like male birds do for the female birds.
HOWEVER, you picking him is only the first half of PART A for making a mammalian connection in the Girl meets Guy process. There’s much more about this extremely important relationship building information in the book and even more in the audio series.
ALSO, I am on a mission to help the generation of women alive now to become the first generation to utilize TMW as the socialization tool it was meant to be. It’s actually fun to learn to apply TMW into your everyday life. To date, every woman who has learned to apply TMW into their everyday lives has never returned to the old paradigm of thinking about relationships, especially with the opposite gender. It provides women (and men) with more happiness and less pain to be sure….
I humbly suggest you get the book and read it. I will also inform you each time I add an audio to the series…. knowledge of TMW is relationship power. Click here to read the book
Best to you….. Gary James
Friday, May 11th, 2012
…Using The Mammalian Way™ as a tool to profile a relationship, how to build or fix it, will not fail you because it is nature’s gift to human kind…
I can accurately profile any woman-man relationship in less than an hour everytime and I can teach Y-O-U to do it too…
It starts with you reading the book or listening to the audio series that supports the book titled,The Mammalian Way™ (TMW).
Thus far there has been a 100% success rate in people who improve their quality of life becasue when they apply the knowledge from the book into their everyday life they can "see" what's going on inside their own relationships.
The reason for such accuracy and success rate is because I did not invent TMW. It's nature's gift to human kind. That's why you can trust it… All I did was to discover it, then drafted a reasonable theory, and I built a workable model of how it fully functions. All I am is your teacher until you can stand on your own two feet.
Women and men both learn more about each other and the true nature of our needs….More to come….Best to you, Gary James.
Monday, May 7th, 2012
…I maintain that the POH in men is at the root of why our culture faces many of the social woes we do….
[In order for you to grasp a useful understanding of the information presented here you need to have read or have available the book titled, The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) as a reference guide.]
All heterosexual males are prone to Perversions of Honor™ (POH). It’s a coping mechanism that automatically emerges out of it’s parent force of nature called The Mammalian Way™ (TMW). [TMW is made up of three existing mammal instincts given to humans at birth and beginning at puberty they congeal into a singular force of nature when Girl meets Guy. Their main function is to help underwrite survival of the species by making sure that female mammals seek out worthy male mammals for the purpose of mating…. Men naturally “seeing” women as sex objects first and women who can become radically insecure when they finally “see” a male they deem worthy are two examples of TMW at work upon human social behavior.] Meanwhile,
POH in men can emerge in quite a number of ways as a temporary faux solution (fake honor) when genuine honor is unavailable. However, too much POH can and will eventually corrupt the honor drive when it is used as an overall replacement to men receiving enough genuine honor.
Junior Seau and many others like him committed suicide and many people think that it’s because of the potential damage done to the brain as a result of the frequent head trauma associated with football. From what I’ve read I believe head trauma can play a role in the reaction to commit suicide….. But so can POH in men…. And it brings pain to many people.
What’s more, just from what I’ve read I am reasonably certain that POH is also responsible for why Jerry Sandusky allegedly turned to young boys for sex….
Now, I share this bit of profiling with you in brief-broad strokes…. Jerry Sandusky was evidently not receiving enough sex from his wife (sex is one of the three main mammal instincts that make up TMW) and he did not receive enough honor after he retired from football.
PLUS, during his career he stayed in the shadow of Joe Paterno as the heir apparent for decades watching Jopa receive honor that he could have gleaned for himself. And these two things combined (no sex, no honor to mention put him in the state of Double Dis) and it drove his mammalian instincts cuckoo crazy! And the way he reacted is most definitely a POH and it is to some degree predictable.
Similarly, Junior Seau’s mammalian instincts also went cuckoo crazy when he realized the abundant source of genuine honor he received during his career had basically dried up. Only he saw it as, he didn’t matter anymore.
The real danger for men and the pain it can cause in relying on the POH coping mechanism in place of genuine honor is the facts that,
1) POH actually emerges out of human cognitive capacity (something that all other mammals do not possess and do not have to contend with)
2) Mammal instincts cannot distinguish between socially acceptable vs unacceptable cognitive behavior motivated by POH. It means that a man; who has sex with young boys, or commits suicide, or is too stubborn to ask for directions when he’s lost because he thinks it would make him look weak, are all the same thing to a man’s mammal instincts once the POH engages. And the POH engaging is not his call because it occurs automatically.
A man can only modulate how the POH manifests. But unless he knows that the POH exists (and/or accidently engages it in ways that our culture accepts or overlooks) he will likely have no clue that he has done anything wrong if his behavior is not socially acceptable. I maintain that the POH in men is at the root of why our culture faces many of the social woes we do…. And we need to pay much more attention to it’s powerful influence over men’s behavior.
As it is, we have two different men professionally involved with football that faced a genuine honor crisis, with two very different outcomes that were both motivated at least in part by the misunderstanding of the POH coping mechanism.
The lesson here is simple: You cannot reason away your mammal instincts. They must be contended with. Some of the answers of how to apply TMW as well as the POH mechanism without it costing a man dearly are in the book. Some are in the audio series now in production.
I am the discoverer of TMW. It took nearly three decades to uncover it, draft a theory, and construct a working model. Thus far I have helped very many people (heterosexual women and men) contend with their mammal instincts that subsequently served to help improve their quality of life, less pain, more pleasure… You have an opportunity now to help others as well as yourself….. Knowing how TMW fully functions never fails to produce positive results….Not knowing how TMW fully functions can cause you grief galore in your personal life… Learn to abate or avoid the pain that POH in men can cause.
I suggest you read the book, listen to the relevant audios, and/or contact me if you wish to talk. By the way, I feel terrible for the many people who are in pain & anguish over the circumstances that surround the lives of Junior Seau and Jerry Sandusky. My thoughts & prayers go out to you.