As unflattering or unsavory as it may seem, given the overall emotional-psychologically charged, imperfectly safe, environment(s) that human’s (and in particular for this post) a woman’s survival instincts as well as her brain’s Cognitive Capacity (CC) face, throughout her life, there emerges a rather unavoidable challenge within the personal relationships she forges with men. That is, the vast majority of heterosexual (straight) women will sooner or later, likely end up becoming a Captured Vagina (CV) for some guy at least once in her life… The results of which are usually not welcome because her life is typically blindsided and/or traumatized by the experience(s)…  

Moreover, most women who have been traumatized by the realization that she has become a Captured Vagina (CV) within a personal relationship with a man might not recognize it as such when it happens to them. However, she sure does identify with how it feels! Especially as the why & how she became a CV and what can be done about it is explained.   

Right here is the first hurdle to overcome. That is, to identify the actual issue(s) at work which turn her into a CV (In HIS mind’s eye). This is important because prior to reading my work many women typically refer to elements of the process which turn her/you into a CV by some other name or phrase (“why don’t he commit?” or, “when we became a couple he was wonderful but lately he’s been a complete A-Hole”, etc.). These are examples of the signals or warning signs that you are becoming a CV…

CV BOWLBut as the explanations mount, your confusion about why men genuinely behave the way they do, will tend to fade. Along with this, you will very quickly relate to the Captured Vagina (CV) as a syndrome because you are living “it”.

 So, what can cause multitudes of 21st Century women who swear they are empowered and have shown they “do not need a man to survive” to become trapped in a physiological state called a Captured Vagina (CV)?

The answers are easy to say and relatively easy for a woman to feel an accurate sense of, but let me assure you that explaining the why & how a 21st Century woman can easily become trapped in such a state within her personal relationship with a man takes more than a couple or a few blog posts. However, it is a reasonable place to start…


Initially you might not believe what I am about to share and that is your choice. But two things are certain; 1) it is not likely that any efforts from all of human kind combined will ever change the way your social-survival instincts function. Most people who think that they can/have accomplished such a feat are only exercising suppression, repression, or the likes. (FYI, I have not fully explained the social-survival instincts yet)… 2) Over many millennium men have tried every way imaginable to trample a woman’s social-survival instincts out of existence (FYI, there’s a very good reason for this grotesque behavior which I will also explain later). Meanwhile,

There are consequences (some of them are dire) for both genders whenever you discount the power of your instincts because they are an innate birthright. [See the post on this blog regarding the “Cornucopia of Confusion” for a partial explanation of the consequences.]

CV HOOKWith this in mind and in response to the question, “how does a woman become a Captured Vagina?” (CV); the lowest common denominator that motivates every living creature on earth to do anything is Survival of the Species (SOS). Human beings are a part of the mammal and the animal kingdoms. Within that realm, there is clear evidence via the observable behavior that the FEMALE picks the MALE for a personal relationship that usually leads (or might lead) to SEX.

[Sex is one of three (sex, security, honor) very powerful animal/mammal social-survival instincts that influence human social behavior that can lead to perpetuating the human species. (FYI, given the human brain’s extraordinary Cognitive Capacity (CC) sex that occurs between the genders is not limited to mating & procreation. It can also lead to sex for fun, sex for love, sex for romance, etc…)]*

As it relates to a woman becoming a Captured Vagina (CV) it’s her animal instincts that tell her intelligence (cognitive capacity (CC)) that SHE is the one who picks the man for a personal relationship [FYI, given the nature of human CC a personal relationship can be distinctly different than a relationship based on business]. So, despite the fact that a woman “does not need a man to survive,” the animal instinct that resides deep down inside her continues to nudge her such that she instinctively still WANTS a man.

 LADIES: This is where most of your troubles in personal relationships with men begin. It includes the risk of becoming a CV in HIS mind’s eye…

CV NETContinuing, in order for your instinctive WANT for a man to become a tangible relationship in the human realm, your two female social-survival instincts (i.e., SEX-attached to love & romance and SAFETY/SECURITY) must pass through what amounts to be a human female Cognitive Prism (the cognitive prism AKA the PSOI is a coping mechanism for women. It is not my invention. The PSOI is attached to the instincts, which are attached to SOS). In essence, this cognitive prism converts your instinctive WANT for a man/mate into a cognitive, warm & fuzzy, psychological NEED… that by itself is not a bad thing at all. In fact, this conversion process is the main reason why, for example, romance novels that are hundreds of years old such as Jane EyrePride & Prejudice, etc. can still have universal appeal amongst multitudes of 21st Century women (that is to say, a woman’s social-survival instincts for security, love, sex, & romance never changes).

This conversion process is also part of what makes a Fairytale Relationship genuinely feasible in the 21st Century.*

 Meanwhile, the INSTINCTIVE WANT into PSYCHOLOGICAL NEED is subject to a coping mechanism that manifests from the animal instincts and plays out through her human CC via a process called, Pendulum Swing of Insecurity™ (PSOI) in Women. * 

 Thus far, most of what puts a woman at risk for becoming a CV is relatively easy to learn and to manage. However, the next aspect of how a woman can become a CV called, Perversions Of Honor™ (POH) in Men* might initially strike you as the mind blower… But that’s another blog post.

 *[See the books and audios for further information.]

 Best Wishes, Gary James

 Copyright © Gary James 2014





If you have a friend or family member who is about to be married, getting engaged, or planning a wedding then you can give them the book titled, The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) and/or audio series as a gift.

Unique and valuable in that it shares nature’s secrets of how a woman and a man can both gain what they truly desire from the same relationship….

TMW is necessary information if a woman is ever to be “seen” as equal in a world where; men (including husbands) are getting worse in their treatment of women, women often compromise their standards to be or remain in a committed relationship, marriage has a mere 50/50 chance for success, and where relationship issues abound….AND it also provides you with knowledge of what to do to avoid or abate such overwhelming situations from happening to you.

AND LOVE?…Love is great…. Love conquers all…. and the heart is the place where love is received and conveyed but without a solid mammalian connection that gives love a place to grow most relationships will fail miserably…

Your order also helps to spread the word about this wonderful gift from nature…click here… Best,

Gary James

George Clooney and Amal Alamuddin Clooney’s Mammalian Bond

George_Clooney_Amal_Alamuddin George Clooney has a list of girlfriends as long as my arm, so why did he give up being a bachelor and get married again after 22 years. I believe it is because he has made a mammialian connection with Amal Alamuddin. I have been studying relationships for more than 50 years and discovered what I call “The Mammialian Way”

I have never interviewed either one but after reading about the couples meeting and how he “strutted” in front of her like other mammals do in pursuit of a mate. If you have studied my work you know that Girl picks Guy. George met his now wife in September of 2013. She refused his number but after getting her email address he proceeded to send her messages trying to win her over. The emails finally did the trick, it sounds like a jane Austin novel.

1411923070_george-clooney-gGeorge Clooney had woman falling at his feet, so why work so hard with Amal. George’s instincts must have told him that she was “The One”. Women have stronger instincts but tend to ignore them more often than men. It does not matter if the man is interested in a woman, if she does not feel the same way a bond will never be started.

“The Mammialian Way” is how all mammals connect in order for Survival of the Species. Thus far what I teach to each gender has a 100% success rate in producing positive results. This is because I did not invent TMW force of nature and it is not my philosophy. Its natures gift to all humans and I was diligent enough as a social scientist and I am honored to be the one who discovered how TMW functions inside each gender and how to apply it in our everyday lives….

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lasso vaginaHilary Clinton, Maria Shriver, Sandra Bullock, Eva Longoria, Elin Nordegren, Katy Perry, Demi Moore, Jenny Sanford, Adele, etc. are all examples of women who became a Captured Vagina (CV) Conquered Vagina (CON-V) or both, within the Personal Relationship (PR) they had with the “man in their life” at the time.

The women I mention in the paragraph above are/were at one point or another reasonably famous. I use their stories as examples of empowered women who became a CV within their PR because their stories are relatively easy for you to research on the internet. You will find in each instance, she’s in a PR that appears to be healthy and doing fine, perhaps even with a tone of a fairytale relationship with THE ONE or a soul-mate…  Only to find suddenly that the relationship was little more than fodder for her to have become a captured vagina… All of these women mentioned were in fact a CV within a PR that for practical purposes from its inception did not really exist as her perceptions saw the relationship…  

CV JUJU Meanwhile, regardless of your socio-economic status, heterosexual women tend to be attracted to what you personally perceive in a man as his power. Such attraction can greatly influence (positive or negative) your social behavior because it emanates from the built in (instinctive-cognitive) coping mechanism called, Pendulum Swing of Insecurity (PSOI)*. The attraction toward a man’s power is the same physiological need for security you might have for sex & romance that sweeps through your life’s Personal Relationships (PR) like a pendulum; always moving but barely a place to ever set down all the insecurity at one time. Your uncanny need for security is also a woman’s birthright to rule over the social behavior between the genders as matriarch (just like the other female creatures who’s species fall within the categories of animal/mammal).

None the less, a place to set down all your insecurity and the right to rule the PR’s in your life almost never happen to a woman in a PR because the premise for the emotional-psychological benefits to permeate your PR’s was likely carved from your life by some guy (or guys) on or around the time you completed puberty.

Gary at 6In other words, the reason that so many 21st century women (including you) are prone to becoming a Captured Vagina is because MEN knowingly (cognitively) or unknowingly (instinctively) through the course of a PR set it up that way. They leave you with little choice than to put yourself in a position within a PR to risk becoming a CV at HIS leisure from the relationship’s inception…

The question is, *what can be done to avert or abate being at risk in the first place? *What can be done to avoid your life being blindsided by a PR that had NO mammal connection beyond Sex (if that) with him? For those answers and more please be on the lookout for the release of my new book that shares with you what to do. In the meantime, if you have questions email me at


Gary James

(C) Gary James 2014

*[See books and audios for further information]



CV JUJUA woman’s risk of becoming a Captured Vagina (CV) status (or its related cousin called Conquered Vagina (CON-V)) while in a Personal Relationship (PR) with a man, boils down to the silent influencer and the lowest common denominator for all emotional-psychological manifestations of both genders in personal relationships (PR’s) called, The Mammalian Way™* (TMW). [TMW is a force of nature that plays a role in the social behavior between men & women in a Personal Relationship (PR) where sex is also a factor or can become a possibility no matter how remote, for either person in the PR…]*

Without the direction of how TMW functions, initially, we humans tend to use our Cognitive Capacity (CC) to discount the influence TMW has over PR’s at the instinctive level of life. You are now beginning to learn that over many millennium human beings (women more so than men) have paid a very dear price for this lack of knowledge…**.This is one reason why my focus is on how TMW can affect women who have, or want to have a quality PR with a male. Another good reason to focus on women’s needs is the fact that it is the woman who picks the man for a PR.  

With that in mind there are numerous issues, sub issues, and consequences** that can be discussed about how TMW silently influences human social behavior between the genders. For the sake of brevity in a blog-post venue, I will share in this post one of the more compelling scenarios that women are prone to do and to repeat if they do not know how TMW functions.

It is a two-fold issue that also carries a very high-risk consequence of you becoming a Captured Vagina (CV).  


With the possible exception of the so-called unexplainable attraction that a woman has for a particular man, most heterosexual women past the age of puberty when they get involved in a PR with a man will…

1) Likely tend to ignore or suppress your social-survival instincts as they attempt to communicate with you.

 2) You will most often erroneously think you can change a man. Whereby, the thinking you do and the subsequent actions you take with regard to changing a man’s behavior in a PR is a cognitive notion. Such notions of the mind, no matter how well intended are merely guessing when measured against how a man actually reacts to you instinctively. The notion of changing a man (or a woman) to suit your cognitive perceptions of him or the PR you have with him will just as often reveal how woefully inaccurate the judgment put forth by the human brain’s Cognitive Capacity (CC) can become in light of the reality that people do not change. Rather, they emerge.

Fortunately, when you understand this distinction in human behavior it will allow for the ordinary emergence & functioning of TMW instincts into human social interaction even though you tend to suppress*it. This function is necessary because your social-survival instincts are directly attached to Survival of the Species (SOS). Such a close attachment to the most primal motivation for all living creatures is the basis for what creates TMW bond.

Included in this bond are such elements as, scent, touch, taste, sound sleep, sexual attraction, and the place where love attaches itself to in order to grow, etc. These and more all go into forming TMW bond that without which YOUR SOCIAL-SURVIVAL INSTINCTS WILL NOT PERCEIVE THE EXISTENCE OF A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM…of course this can represent an extreme danger to nearly all PR’s right from the beginning because beyond sexual attraction most people do not recognize the bonding process or they use their CC to interfere with TMW bond being formed… and that's bad for the PR to say the least…

lasso vagina

Meanwhile, the close connection to SOS is the chief reason why TMW’s influence simply cannot be ignored without consequence(s).  Once you digest my work, you will see that TMW is a closed system, perfectly suited for humans to balance their Cognitive abilities with their instinctive inheritance for the sake of SOS. From this emerges;

 A) Humans as the dominate species for all of earth’s creatures and

B) The ability to gain genuine equality between the human genders by instinctively as well as cognitively knowing how to care for each other’s needs. (If/when your emotional-psychological needs are being cared for it also substantially reduces the risk of becoming a CV)**

On the other hand, it is misunderstanding TMW’s instinctive influence over a PR that is the chief reason why a woman’s efforts to influence a man’s behavior from a predominantly Cognitive perspective in a PR (and suppressing the instincts) usually fails miserably.

A perfect example of how such a scenario can play out in everyday life is embodied in the question.  “How many former couples do you know of that started out claiming to be soul-mates (or the likes) who might even get married, then a few months or a few years later they cannot stand to look at each other or even be in the same room?”

When this or a similar scenario occurs in your life, rest assured that no instinctive mammal bond has formed (Remember: Sexual attraction is only one aspect of a complete mammal bond). Along with this lack of a mammal bond comes a powerful sense that you are/were little more than a CV for him even though you might not be familiar with the term, Captured Vagina*…  


CV BOWLWhy such a scenario that easily leads to you becoming a CV in his life can occur in such abundance is because you fall for your own cognitive illusion of a man and/or the illusion that he can be "changed". You might even tell yourself that you don’t want to change him. This is another cognitive fallacy because your instincts MUST connect to his in order to form TMW bond that facilitates the emergence of his honor instinct into your PR. Most often the bonding process initially FEELS like he’s changing when he’s simply emerging the particular instinctive qualities already inside him that your instinctive emotional needs require and see in him, that as they emerge solidifies the part of a PR that makes YOU feel safe AND special… …

PLUS, if you have ignored or suppressed your instincts (or you have not been taught nature's process to assimilate them into a relationship) then there is likely NO mammal bond forming and without that bond then your own instincts will eventually reject him as THE ONE regardless of what your CC can conjure up in your imagination.

Gary at 6

His instincts silently rejecting you (and your instincts silently rejecting him) is what typically causes most PR’s to erode into oblivion long before the actual-tangible troubles emerge between you…

Meanwhile, by the time your CC and your instincts catch up to the fact your soul mate is disintegrating from the inside out most men are already astute at relying on their innate coping mechanism called, Perversions of Honor™ (POH) in Men.* The POH in men is the male counterpart to the Pendulum Swing of Insecurity™ (PSOI) in women.* It’s where all of his emotions lay. 

However (and here’s the bad part) because of the increasingly Imperfectly Safe World (ISW) environment that humans currently live in, most men in a PR with a woman are prone to use their POH coping mechanism to deceive women (as well as himself) into "believing" that he IS/CAN BECOME what she wants him to become. ….

He generally behaves in this deplorable manner almost unconsciously for the sake of his own ego(tism) as opposed to his honor. He is essentially able to pass on ego(tism) as though it were honor and temporarily gets your instincts to BUY IT because there’s one congruent element between men’s ego(tism) {False Honor} and his actual honor instinct that your instincts also recognize, namely, the Hunter-Gatherer (HG)***  element.

In my next blog-post on the subject of a woman becoming a CV, I will explain the perverted process that deceives women into becoming a Captured Vagina of her own free will…

Gary James

*[See the books and audios for further information.]


 **[See the post on this blog regarding the “Cornucopia of Confusion” for a partial explanation of the consequences.]


 ***[I have released an audio called Honor Vs Ego(tism) in Men that more fully explains what a woman can do to identify ego from honor in a man’s social behavior and what can be done about it to avoid becoming a CV. I highly recommend all heterosexual women past puberty listen to it.]

Copyright © Gary James 2014




…it is very possible to accurately profile the potential in a man or in a personal relationship before you get involved so long as you know how The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) functons…

TMW MALE ICONIn recent months a number of you have discovered my talent for accurately profiling personal relationships (I have been accurately profiling personal relationships since I was 6 years old).

Given that most of you seem to have the most difficulty when you try to accurately profile your own personal relationships (or potential ones) with the opposite gender and the fact that most of my readers are women, this is the place where I will focus.

LADIES: For those of you who might not be at least somewhat familiar with my discovery called The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) when it comes to relationships, TMW has two major areas; 1) The animal/mammal social-survival instincts (made up of the three primary social instincts… sex, security & honor) and 2) the human brain’s extraordinary cognitive capacity (CC)…

[These two major areas are nature’s own or God’s own innate aspects of human physiology. They are not a concept or the invention of imperfect humans. They are also in direct lineage to Survival of the Species (SOS) which is one of the most important instincts for all of life as we know it (this is why you can trust what you learn about TMW with regard to personal relationships). The close connection that TMW has with SOS is also a big reason why the two major areas of TMW can have such a subtle yet powerful influence over our social behavior.]

Accordingly then, it only stands to reason that until you educate yourself about TMW you are at high risk of being BURNED in a personal relationship with a man… In fact, being burned is usually what happens to women who do not know how TMW instincts function.

What typically happens to you in a relationship when you do not know TMW is you will grossly misjudge HIS social behavior because 1) you will usually misread your own animal/mammal impulses common to all other female animal/mammals AND/OR, 2) you will misuse the imagination portion of your brain’s extraordinary Cognitive Capacity (CC) to “fall” for or otherwise be attracted to the self deluded image that a man’s potential IS the man. Or, you might be prone to both of these inadequacies and sometimes these will happen simultaneously.

In addition to this, there is A THIRD THING THAT MOST OFTEN HAPPENS when a woman allows herself to be trapped inside such a no-win scenario as misreading and/or misusing her innate abilities. That is, SHE BECOMES A COMPLETE STRANGER TO HERSELF.

TMW FEMALE ICON ONEAll of this can & does happen because you simply do not know how TMW instincts function… To profile the potential in a man or a relationship without knowing how TMW functions is like applying your facial make up to the bottom of your feet in order to get a man to look away from seeing the “flaws” that your perceptions see in the mirror. It might be a commendable effort but it certainly is preposterous!… and it never works long term…    

Still, it is very possible to profile the potential in a man or in a personal relationship before you get involved. And, so long as you know how to apply TMW in your everyday life TMW can also lead you straight to THE ONE…

So, from a basic secular point of view, how in the world are you going to accurately assess a man’s behavior toward you in a personal relationship OR, assess the direction a personal relationship might be “headed” for if & when you are in the state of mind where you have become a stranger to yourself?!    

Gary at 6Thus far, the vast majority of women I have helped to bring back from the emotional-psychological hell that is ever potentially akin to personal relationships (and helped them put their feet on the road to happier, healthier relationships) were indeed strangers unto their selves at the point they found my work… [They were circling the drain of the Cornucopia of Confusion (COC) but that’s another blog.]

Meanwhile, let me help you. Here’s how…

If you own my first book, The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) (current price $10.00 subject to change without notice) then I will profile one relationship (or potential relationship) for free. This also usually helps you to get a more positive bearing on your own emotional-psychological well being… To allow me the honor of helping you contact me direct at…


Gary James

The Mammalian Way™ UPDATE: achieve EMPOWERMENT & personal FULFILLMENT simultaneously

…Men long ago learned to trust their instincts while women were taught to discount or down play trust in theirs…

TMW FEMALE ICON ONEWhen I started this blog I promised myself that I would not write a post just to keep the search engine crawlers coming back to my site. So what do I do to attract readers? That's actually reasonably easy because I know that nearly all human social issues stem from a lack of understanding about our human mammal survival instincts and my first book is about the mammalian way of things in human behavior. Meanwhile,

The people who find this blog site are usually very busy but they also usually have great need in terms of their emotional-psychological well being. As it is for now and because my work provides tangible answers to life’s social woes, answers that many people find they are unable to glean from typical sources available to them (psychiatrists, psychologists, Guru’s, other health care professionals, friends, support groups, etc) this has meant that referrals thus far has been a very helpful method to pass the word about my work and this blog… I thank you for that.

In keeping with my original intent, this post is the first one in months because I am in the midst of three things. From my continued efforts I am; now writing two new books and an audio series that further share with you tangible ways to apply the discovery I made called The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) into everyday life.

{By the way, the feedback I have received has been overwhelmingly positive. It can be summed up in the comment; “Gary, TMW is Soooooo Cool. It works every time but it does take some consistent effort to get it to connect at first.”} Of course it works and takes a little time to connect… especially when most of you have been taught (learned response & behavior) to ignore, deny, discount, or down play your instincts (unlearned response & behavior).

Sigmund FreudTMW is not an invention or a mere philosophy of human kind. It’s an instinctive force of nature just like hunger or thirst. It’s been actively influencing the social-survival instincts of the various species of animal/mammals since before humans existed. Until my work surfaced literally none of the social scientists from at least the time of Sigmund Freud onward had even tried to isolate or identify it (There are several reasons why this occurred that are discussed in the new books).

Meanwhile, what you need to do in order to benefit from applying TMW in terms of improved self confidence, empowerment, as well as Personal Fulfillment, is simply learn to trust your social- survival instincts and I can show you how… Learning to trust your judgment influenced by the instinctive qualities of TMW, which is one of nature’s gifts to species survival is especially true for women. (Men long ago learned to trust their instincts while women were taught to discount or down play trust in theirs)

women in shadow group Plus, I have been helping an ever growing number of people (mostly women) to rectify their lives back to the norm for them. This includes; personal as well as professional relationships for example. As for women, awareness of and how to apply TMW helps your emotional-psychological posture such that you can better enjoy with confidence two things simultaneously that quite often can only seem to be achieved as a trade off; Namely, Empowerment AND a sense of Personal Fulfillment in their lives.

Incidentally, all of what I have been doing to write and to help takes time so the blog has been on the back burner so to speak.

As you peruse this blog site you will notice I am preparing a button to accept donations. I am adding the donation button at the suggestion of the readers who follow my blog.


Also, for those of you who tried to purchase my first book and/or the first installment of the audio series, you will notice that it is nearly impossible to do so. This is because I am not versed in the product fulfillment end of the information industry. So until I get the newest members of the Paveginnias™ staff to help complete the process of ordering direct on line, if you wish to order please email me directly.

At this point the only two items available are the introductory book titled, The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) and the first installment of the audio series called, Honor vs ego(tism) in Men™ (HVE). They can be purchased individually or as a package…my direct email is, Best,

Gary James, author


The following review was written and sent to me by a woman who has learned to apply The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) in her everyday life and she says it has made her "blissfully happy"

Once you implement The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) into your daily life, you will be able to recognize it everywhere. TMW states that there are three instincts in people, sex and honor in men and sex and safety in woman. 

Most every woman that reads Fifty Shades of Grey would love to have that kind of relationship. Whether it includes BDSM or just plain old vanilla, woman want a Christian Grey in their bed. A man that will make them feel safe, a man they are bonded to at the molecular level, a man that makes them feel desired… A dominate man with a gentle touch.

Men may think that they cannot compete with a billionaire, sexy, fictional character but they most definitely can. It does not matter if you look like Channing Tatum or Danny DeVito, it does not matter who makes the most money. What matters is if the man has the ability to take the lead in a relationship and can make her feel safe, loved and special.

Just like Ana & Christian, when you met “THE ONE” you just know it. With Christian, it took a little longer because his cognitive capacity (CC) kept trying to overrule his instincts. In the first book, Christian suffers from Perversions of Honor™ (POH) in Men. Ana is able to prompt his honor drive but because of his CC he slips right back into POH. It is not until Ana leaves him that he begins to trust his instincts more than his brain. Just like with all men, they will fall right back into POH, if the woman in their life does not continue to jump-start their honor drives.

Since Ana has never been in a relationship before Christian, she never had to deal with her Pendulum Swing of Insecurity™ (PSOI) in Women. It makes her a bit emotionally unstable at first. When Christian is not suffering from POH, he is able to calm down the swing. Until she meets Christian she is an unfulfilled empowered woman (UEW), she trusted on her instincts not to date men like Jose and Paul because she knows they are not THE ONE.

Christian is the epitome of an alpha male but women give men their identity within a personal relationship… and that is exactly what Ana does for Christian. Christian’s past relationships have almost all been contractual, except for “Mrs. Robinson”.  His relationship with Ana is his first romantic relationship that develops outside the “red room of pain”.

Ana does not change Christian, people cannot change. We are who we are, just as with alcoholics they may be clean and sober but will always be alcoholics. What Ana does is encourages honorable behavior from Christian and gives him the identity of a boyfriend instead of a dom. Christian will always be fifty shades but is able to emerge into a more romantic, less controlling and more open minded person.

In the first two Fifty Shades books, we see how the meshing process works and how mammalian bonds are formed.  If you know how TMW operates you will be able to see how love grows and attaches itself to the mammalian bond and makes it practically unbreakable.

Christian saw the Imperfectly Safe World (ISW) that we live in and always tried to keep Ana as safe as possible. He tried (and failed) to provide her with a Perfectly Safe World (PSW)

Ana and Christian are far from perfect but to most of the people that read the Fifty Shades books, they are the quintessential ideal couple. Fifty shades may help people see what they want out of a relationship but The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) helps us to be able to recognize and keep THE ONE.


Cornucopia of Psychological Confusion: What is it? How to avoid it in your life.


The illustration called the Cornucopia of Confusion is a visual rendering that outlines what has occured in the social sciences since the time of Sigmund Freud. The entire process of human socialization had been stymied because the common denominator for all of the emotional and psychological aspects of human life that I discovered call The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) was missing from the understanding of the people who founded behavioral social-psychology.

My work (books and audio series) brings to the table a viable way to diminish the negative affects of the social woes that plague humanity and especially those related to finding and keeping a relationship with THE ONE whenever Girl meets Guy….



In the last two months I have counseled a number of women and a few men. Now even though I always protect my client’s anonymity there are three women I have counseled with nearly the exact same relationship issues profile and I am going to share just part of it with you.

Ironically, they are from three different areas of the world and religious faiths; one woman is from a sect of Christianity, one is from a sect of Judaism, and one is from a sect of Islam. Why is this important? It’s because The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) does not discriminate.

It’s a force of nature that is at the root of most of the world’s social issues, including personal relationship issues, because of sheer ignorance of it’s existence and how it actually functions on your insides….

Meanwhile, all three women I mentioned are in committed relationships with men that they thought they knew. Based on that belief each of these women felt safe enough with their man that they each began to become more & more emotionally naked in front of him…. because they saw him as a “Rock to rest their personal insecurities upon” (See PSOI in my book).

[FYI, Emotional nakedness is a stage in a relationship that many women never reach and most men never see because most women never reach a point where they feel emotionally safe enough with him to get emotionally naked in front of him,,,, Emotional nakedness is also a test to “see” how the relationship is doing.]

But as each of the three women continued to reveal to their man their emotionally naked self they all three reported that they abruptly or suddenly stopped the process of sharing their inner most self with “that man” because, “he just could not handle it”. One of the three even told me, “He went from being a rock to a pebble.” 

What’s interesting about this is, these women are not alone. An ever increasing multitude of women are in the same situation and it’s an earth wide issue. Why?

It’s because men’s ineptness to handle the everyday emotional upheaval that occurs in a woman’s life is caused by Perversion’s of Honor™ in Men (POH).

Meanwhile, all three women read my first book titled, The Mammalian Way™ (TMW) and all three listened to the audio segment titled, Honor Vs Ego(tism) in Men (HVE).

To be honest, initially, most women become at least a little upset by what they learn from the book & audio because they do not want to accept that the instincts we humans are given at birth, some of which we have in common with all the other animals on the earth could play such an important role in a human to human relationship as to be a determining factor in whether or not a relationship fails or flourishes.

One woman of the three remarked, "It seemed to be too cold at first." And it’s because a woman’s need for security often induces a powerful cognitive notion that they need to be seen as “special”, and that's true. So as part of my council I always explain to all women that indeed the instincts CAN seem cold and calculated, so to speak, at least at first, because they are about one basic thing, namely, Survival Of The SpeciesI And at that level of life it can be raw.

So it is normal for a woman to initially assume and feel as though she is being categorized as just another female, based on instincts, and I explain that it should bother them some. No big deal, because once a woman adapts her cognitive capacity (CC) to modulate the inner drives from the instincts as opposed to mitigate them it’s what engages nature’s own ability to rectify the “something missing” feeling that most women harbor and attest to along with many other things such as getting HIM to open up. AND, it also serves to help a woman get her CC in balance with her TMW instincts!

To get your CC in balance with TMW instincts is the key to everything emotional or psychological in a woman’s life. And this is the true power of TMW. The book(s) and the audio series are the keys to understanding and gleaning that balance. And when you do get in balance everything about your personal life gets brighter to be sure.

As for the three women and the issue of getting a man to open up, they all three essentially said, “it’s been easier to get him to “see” his responsibility for my [meaning her] emotional needs.” To which I say, YEP, it is actually easy to engage his emotions (feelings) once you understand TMW.

You end up with a much more powerful sense of self that emerges as happiness, more emotional balance, and much more confidence in yourself as well as in your personal relationship(s) with the opposite gender. I have never seen it fail. And that’s because TMW is from nature… it’s not my invention or philosophy.

By the way, all three of the women I write about in this post are empowered women who have personal relationship issues with the opposite gender. The issue of a woman who is empowered in every other area of her life EXCEPT in her "love-life" seems to go “Hand in Glove” for empowered women of the planet earth regardless of what culture or faith you hail from. So,

Read the book. Listen to the audios. Improve the quality of your love-life and more. Contact me directly if you need to.

Best Wishes,

Gary James